Made ya click!

I knew before marrying Rico we would encounter our own unique versions of marital issues. What I didn’t know is that I would have to learn to differentiate what was an marital issue and just a “me” issue.


Post-marital counseling has done an excellent job in making it crystal clear that ya girl has an abundance of them. In fact, selfishness is sitting real pretty at the top these days. And this is an issue (along with others) I have thrust upon my marriage as if its our flaw or our responsibility to fix.

The sad thing is that these are issues I’ve always been okay with. And now even though I may be okay with them still (sometimes I thoroughly enjoy not considering others), someone is at risk because of it.

So, the next time you are having a disagreement with someone, especially ya manz, I say govern yourself first. Give yourself time to not only analyze the disagreement, but analyze whats going on with you. If it is a “you” issue, humble yourself and admit it. Not just to Jesus, but your partner as well, which is no easy task.  And then begin to take the necessary steps to allow yourself time to gaaahhrroooww through it.

Growth isn’t some one stop shop, like “I came. I saw. I conquered”. No. You’re always coming, you’re always seeing and you will forever be conquering. The amazing thing about growing in marriage as an individual, is that you have someone who is there to be gracious with you through the process.

Today, I am still selfish. Just less selfish than what I was yesterday. My husband hooked me up by giving me examples of ways I display my selfishness and provided suggestions on how to show my considerations. One example, really small but good. Whenever I start the car, I would only turn my seat warmer on and not his. He expressed how much he disliked it  and didn’t understand why I wouldn’t just turn his on as well.

Guess what I do now?








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